This is going to be one of those words-tumbling-from-my-brain onto the page kind of posts, so I hope you can roll with it. Sometimes a blog post will come to me and I know I need to get it onto the page because otherwise it will never make it out. Getting used to the “New Normal” seems to be a regular talking point so I thought I’d chat through some of my current feelings about said New Normal!
The thoughts came to me as I was on a short walk after my very first at home YouTube hiit workout from a well-known fitness YouTuber, as part of my attempt of my new work-life balance, and I knew I probably needed to go and walk it off for fear of not being able to walk for days after otherwise. I deliberately didn’t take my phone with me; hoping I could probably manage a few minutes without it by my side – and it really helped my brain to relax and think. Without that decision not to take it with me I probably wouldn’t have had the clarity to even think these thoughts, let alone the inclination to get them down in a post after.
On my short walk I saw 3 families walking very small children for their first settling in sessions at school. It took me whooshing back to last year when I was starting this transition into my new life. The life of a Mum with 2 children at school for the day and me finally having some time back. It’s been such a privilege to have my 2 little buddies at home for the past 5 years since I made the calculated decision not to return to my office job after baby number 2 due to childcare costs negating much of what I would have earned. To be able to develop my own business and fit my work in between being a full-time mum and full-time business owner.
The hours of work were long once they went to bed, added to those stolen moments throughout the day which were multi-tasking at it’s best! They caused stress-induced ailments and contributed to many a line and wrinkle. But I am so grateful I have given my children that experience to have me home and present every day, even if it meant financial sacrifices. I still wonder how things would have turned out if I stayed in my well-paid office career and didn’t decide to start my own business, one-handed whilst covered in milk sick. For us the sacrifice was worth it and kind of forced upon us, but I know not everyone has that choice to make for themselves.
The children going back this year feels like a brand new start all over again because last year when George began school for the first time I blinked and then it was Christmas, and then 2020 imploded on itself and we were back to full-time-working-from-home-mum all over again. But this time with the added stress and anguish of home-schooling – I wont dwell on that because I definitely want to put that to the back of my mind amongst the other memories I need to never re-live! But seeing those parents this morning and their little (oh-so-little) humans skipping alongside them on their way to the next huge new chapter of their lives made me realise even more so that yes – the days are long, but the years are short – and all the other clichés we are given when we have children. Because before you know it those tough early days when you can’t remember when the last time was your hair wasn’t 90% dry shampoo and you haven’t managed a single wee in peace all week, will be over and you will be able to begin again, begin afresh and start to focus on yourself again and work out the next chapter of this journey called life.
If you’re reading this at the beginning of your motherhood/parenthood journey – that’s a whole new normal any year, let alone the crazy year of 2020, and planning to be a stay-at-home/work-from-home parent then just know these days will not go on forever, despite how endless they feel at the time. Now feels like a bit of a cross-roads for me, although I don’t really believe it yet if this year has anything to do with it! It all feels a little out of my control at the moment so I am making the most of this first week of “freedom” – I had brunch, made appointments without needing to sync calendars and have even booked in to get my hair done for the first time in 18 months tomorrow! And I’m trying to do it all guilt free after this past year of pressure.
But, next week I am back full throttle with a mixture of sadness that my babies are growing so fast but excitement of what lays ahead for us all. My New Normal begins in more ways than one – I am so looking forward to structuring my work-week, not having to work every evening and actually starting to work through some new projects that have been sat on the back burner for a few years!
What do you think?